I was sitting here listening to the new Taylor Swift CD and one of her songs had me in tears just thinking about my babies, it's called Never Grow Up, if you've never heard it I suggest you do! I just started dancing with Christian and realizing that some day Sienna and him are going to grow up and I never want that to happen! Some days when he doesn't sleep all night, I think to myself "man I can't wait until he is old enough not to do this anymore" or when Sienna asks me to get her ramen noodles right when I'm in the middle of feeding Christian I think "oh I can't wait until they can both feed themselves" Sometimes I forget to cherish the little moments I get to have with them depending on me. They're lives are so simple, they've never had to go through heart ache or worry about bills and making sure they have enough money to pay for the months food, and I never want them to feel those worries. I just want them to stay little and enjoy every little moment with them. Just the other day Sienna was telling me she can't wait to grow up and I remember being young and feeling the same way (if only I knew what being grown up entitled :-)). Then I think about my mom, I bet she feels like she blinked and we were all the sudden all grown up, her youngest baby is about to be 21 and we all have kids of our own. She's had to sit there and try to guide us the best she could through our heart breaks and sorrows and I can't imagine how hard that must be! I never want Christian or Sienna to have their heart broken or to learn the hard way that there are many people out there that look trustworthy but really aren't. I'm not saying watching your children grow older is all bad because there have been amazing moments for my parents for sure, like when we get married and have kids of our own and all our many accomplishments along the way, it's just hard to think that someday someone or something is going to teach my children hard lessons and all I'll be able to do is be there for them. I'm going to try my hardest to take many pictures, love and cherish my children, and help them to stay as young as they can and to just enjoy their child hood. Just a little food for thought :-)
